Monday, September 12, 2011

Adventures of Team Sidequest, Vol. 1

Since I spent most of my weekend enjoying the antics of my awesome D&D group, Team Sidequest, I thought I'd spend today's blog retelling some of Saturday's adventure which happened to involve chasing a rather long sidequest that didn't have much to do with the main plot. I'm going to try writing this as a journal-style narrative from my character's point of view, so we'll see how that goes. My character is a Buddhist Monk elf runt (4'2" tall, about even with the halfling and gnome) who is always hungry. She carries a small arsenal of dual wielded weapons. I think they're hidden in the sleeves of her monk robes, and since this is an anime-themed game, I think that's more than reasonable. =P Basic synopsis up till now: We are in Ravenloft chasing a kidnapped little girl with weird blue tattoos on her back and facing down a series of Egyptian-themed mini-gods who are part of the kidnapping scheme. Added into the mix is a horde of modified zombies that come out only in the day time. We've defeated the pig god and the bat god, and there are supposedly 10 more. Anyways, hope you enjoy this. =)

Tuesday
We are in a small trade town just on the other side of the gorge where we defeated the bat-god. It's kind of dull, and the food's not all that great. Sinedentas [dragonborn avenger, basically Toothless] just got an orange kitten. Jim [half orc samurai] got word that a group of priests were seen with a little girl heading toward some port town. I hope the food there is better.

We waited till dusk to leave town since the zombies here don't come out at night. We're crossing a desert right now. It's very dull, and there's no food. I'm so hungry.

Wednesday
I got the best meal ever last night! Near the edge of the desert we encountered a dwarf and his daughter, who happens to be an elf--she was amazing; she could eat without even removing her ninja mask. =O When we found the dwarf he was just off the road hollering. Although that wasn't too unusual, since dwarfs yell a lot normally, Jim and Treviac [blind teifling wizard, with Tyresius, an owl familiar] wanted to investigate. Whatever. I'm glad they did because it turned out that the dwarf, whose name was Gregor, I think, was being attacked by what he called a bullette. It was this giant thing that would bury itself in the sand and jump out and try and eat people. =D We dispatched it, and the best part: Gregor was a great chef. With some help pulling apart the bullette's crunchy exterior we carved it up and cooked it in malt liquor. As a bonus we found a not-yet-digested lamb in the bulette's stomach and Gregor made it into a tasty stew. There's nothing like a full stomach; I find it very enlightening.

The town we are in today is more interesting than the last town, but the people here are not so nice. I sat in the town square famished for 2 hours, and no one was willing to offer food to the poor starving elf girl. T_T It looks like we're going to be here a few days while we wait for the next ferry to come in. On the plus side, Ralph [half-orc martial artist] got a temporary job hunting for river crocodiles. That was fun, and I got some croc stew out of it. =D It was an easy job too; he just had to get in the water and thrash about for a bit, and then poof, a crocodile would pop up and the fishermen with us would spear it.

Later in the evening, the rest of our traveling group came by and said that Sinedentas had gotten word of a temple not far from here that they were going to check out. I was full of croc stew, so I saw no reason to stick around. Ralph and I joined up with everyone else.

Thursday
It's almost dawn, but we're finally here. I'm hungry again. As usual, no one brought any food. Meh. Guess we'll go look around the place.

Friday
So the temple ended up being more interesting than it looked. There were four sections branching off from the central chamber, each with an elemental theme. First we went down the water side. It was really cold down there and we got into a battle with a ton of weird fish people. I passed out half way through the battle; I was so hungry, I couldn't really focus on the things. Kira (gnome cleric) said I almost drowned. That's possible since the room was pretty much a giant cavern lake. I don't really remember much of anything, although I dreamed that I'd visited the Eternal Emperor and he gave me a great banquet. It was sad waking up from that dream, but on the plus side, when I woke up, all the fishy people were dead, and since they were more fish than people, I saw no reason why I couldn't cook a couple of them up for a snack.

We took the fire section next. It was guarded by a great fire elemental, but Ralph booted it in the head. The elemental made a o.O face, like it had never received such a powerful boot to the head before, which it probably hadn't. I don't think most people try kicking fire elementals in the face, if that's what you could really call it. The earth section had a gorgon. I really wanted to climb up on it's back and use this pressure point power I have to immobilize something--kind of like acupuncture, only more useful. It would have looked really cool, but the gorgon wouldn't stay still long enough. It was dead before I could catch up to it. Sadly, neither the fire elemental nor the gorgon were edible. I was starting to get hungry again. In the air section, Treviac found an air archon and negotiated a way to send it back to its plain of existence. That was easy, and I don't think I could have eaten the archon anyways.

Each section had a key. In the water section, the key was held by a man encased in ice floating in the middle of the lake. We melted the ice to get to it, but unfortunately we melted the key too. Using a ritual Kira determined that if we could collect the water from the ice key, it'd still work. We had plenty of empty waterskins so that wasn't a problem. The fire and earth keys were pretty simple. The air key was interesting; it was essentially incorporeal, so we couldn't pick it up. Treviac sucked it into his mouth and spit it into a bottle. I wonder what it tasted like?

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that when we got to the temple Sinedentas's kitten couldn't come in the temple. She said she was leaving it near the entrance so it'd be safe, but it turned out that it really could not enter because the temple was warded against it. It also turned out that the kitten could talk and had told Sinedentas that it was really a 20,000 year old gold dragon and was cursed to look like a kitten. So, this was really why Sinedentas had told us to come to this temple. The kitten told us that we needed to use the keys to access an artifact that would change her back into a dragon. Although most everyone was a little grumpy at not being told the real reason we'd run through the temple, the kitten was so adorable that it was hard to stay angry at it for long--except for Kuroshi [human goth/emo/creepy magic girl] who claimed it was a horrific abomination and needed to die.

When we went to use the keys, a ghost of a pretty young lady appeared--the same one that had appeared a week or so ago while we were camped out. Interestingly enough, there were statues and frescos in the temple that looked like her. She kept waving her hands around--telling us that this was something we shouldn't do. The kitten said that she was the King's wife in life and that she was the one responsible for trapping her in a kitten form, so of course she wouldn't want us to get the artifact. Since pretty much every temple we've been to since arriving in this world has been evil, and one even tried to sacrifice us, really, why would we trust the ghost lady? So, we recovered the artifact, which was an ornate dagger. Kira said it was evil, and I guess she'd know, but that made sense since the temple was evil, so we gave it to the cat, except she wasn't really a cat, but she wasn't a gold dragon either; she was Bastet, one of the twelve (now ten) mini-gods here. We tried attacking her, but that didn't go over so well. She was a lot stronger and faster than the other two gods we'd faced before. We settled for snatching the dagger from her and returning it to the temple, which she conveniently still couldn't enter. Boy was she pissed at us. She summoned a swarm of cats to come into the temple after us, and by swarm I mean thousands upon thousands of cats. We retreated to the giant lake. The cats wouldn't follow us into the lake--good thing because I think they would have eaten us. We did eventually find an alternative exit via an outlet where the water from the lake washed into another cave. Long story short, we pissed off a nasty god--although we at least kept her from keeping the artifact--and discovered that the ghost lady was possibly on our side (the enemy of our enemy is our friend), but otherwise didn't accomplish anything useful. I'm still hungry, and we haven't gotten any closer to finding the kidnapped girl.

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